The Shantysingers Personal Antiviral Shanty Mask
Baggyrinkle Stereoscopic Giggleometer
After many months of research the makers of the famous Baggyrinkle Giggleometer have now produced a suitable device for singing shanties in these difficult times.
Known as the SPASM it incorporates all the essentials for safely singing shanties during lockdown .
It is completely portable, lightweight and comfortable to wear, produces accurate reproduction of the wearers singing in perfect stereo with complete remote output control so that the group manager can monitor and control group volume.
It has 7 volume presets from Dave right up to Tony and has a remote shanty synthesiser that can be clipped to a microphone
It is equipped with a refreshment reservoir which will hold a pint of Guinness or other suitable tonsilar lubricant.
Due to difficulties related to the pandemic and the advent of BREXIT the technical dept. has move from France to Waunarlwydd but still employs the same staff with a high degree of electronic expertise.
At maximum sound output it will kill harmful viruses over an area of 20 square metres, and has also been known to remove plaster from the wall.